The Joke is on Zoltar

Zoltar
Zoltar By insidethemagic@Flickr.com, Some rights reserved (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

The joke’s on Zoltar.

I actually liked school. I was a great student. At 12 years old, I rarely had to study for most subjects, and I could go in and ace tests in half the time it took others to flunk them. Sure, I was kind of a nerd, and my teachers weren’t too fond of my smartass questions, but it was part of the experience. I haunted the library, was popular with the girls that needed help with their homework (hello, math, you’ve been good to me) and I had a lot of time to indulge in my hobbies.

Imagine what I can do now, with thirty years more of accumulated knowledge and life experience, and with the technology of today. Research is a joke, with the internet rendering the library superfluous. Decades of material is available on my cellphone and tablet. My teachers would hate me even more, because producing information to rebut the inaccurate and inconsistent stuff that they throw out would be easy. I could even show them a Keynote presentation of how wrong what they’re saying is. (The Religion teacher might have me “disappear”.)

Most of all, Zoltar is handing me an extra 30 years of life. Never mind the first day of school, which would go by in the wink of an eye. Survival isn’t an issue. It’s how much you can get away with in a class of real 12-year olds, when you have an unfair advantage. You’re looking forward to the potential of a “New Game +” mode in life. Sure, you’ve temporarily lost all the relationships, resources and assets that you had as an adult. All of that can be gained back. and you can avoid all the costly mistakes this time. You’ll make more, sure, but at least you’ve reduced the pitfalls.

So Zoltar baby, lay it on me. Let’s do this.

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3 thoughts on “The Joke is on Zoltar

  1. I can relate to your post, I aced at school too. I would happily go back in time and be the star of the class again and live in the safe cocoon of assuming that I am the Best. The world outside school rocked me and I am still rocking (pun intended). But talking of changing things in past… heard somewhere that our life is like an arrow which has left its bow, all actions and events are inevitable. All our wise moves and our follies too, are just as per the Plan. I think even if we go back in time, we can just relive it and we wont be permitted to nudge it even an inch. What do you say?

    1. Hi! The way I read the prompt, we’re not going back in time. Following the Tom Hanks movie “Big”, your body just changes to match the age. So in this case, it’s still you, and it’s still today, but you’re in the body of a 12-year old. That said, there are a lot of theories about time travel and paradox and the Butterfly effect. I prefer to think that we remain in control of our destiny, no matter what happens. Thanks for dropping by! 🙂

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